Tears & Goodbyes

After a great first two weeks of school, we have all settled into our routine - all expect for Landon. Last week at Open House, his teacher told me that he had been upset that morning. Each morning afterwards, he has had a harder and harder time separating. I have had to leave him crying down the hallway, "I only need to give her one more hug." Every day when I pick him up, he always says he has had a great day. His teacher has assured me that once he settles in, he interacts, answers questions and has a great time. Even though I know that, my heart aches every morning when I leave him.

This week, we have started counting hugs and kisses. He gets three kisses and one big hug before school. So far, he still will cry but has had a little easier time settling in. Hopefully, we will break through this cycle and he will be back to his previous demeanor. Until then, pray for both of us!

Playground Lessons

Today the boys had another great day. After talking awhile with Camden this afternoon, he told us that he was the last person to be picked for the football game at recess. My heart broke. It didn't seem to bother him, it was just another fact.

As I was wrestling through my own emotions, I felt stirred to read the boys You Are Special tonight. I love this book! It is about little wooden people carved by a woodworker named Eli. The people go around and give stars or dots to people for their achievements or lack there of. At the conclusion of the book, one of the wooden people goes to Eli to find out why neither stars nor dots stick to a girl named Lucia. Eli's response: "Because she has decided that what I think is more important than what they think . . . What they think doesn't matter, Punchinello. All that matters is what I think. And I think you are pretty special."

This book portrays God's love for us so beautifully. Tonight, Eli's response is my prayer for the boys. I pray that they would confidently know God's love for them and who they are in Him. Thank you Father for the encouragement I needed.

Back to School

Yesterday, the boys started school. They were so excited. This year they both are at Ben Lippen and it is such a blessing. Even though they were excited, I was a little anxious about leaving them both. As a mom, it has been so hard to release and re-release the boys into God's hands.

After leaving the school, I had a couple of uninterrupted hours to do whatever I wanted. I was so blessed to be able to read my old journal entries. In February 2007, I had written a journal entry specifically praying for Camden and our school choice. At the time, he was in preschool and we were trying to decide the path for the next school year. God is so faithful. He absolutely led us to the right school for our kids and provided a way for them to be there. Amidst all sorts of feelings, I felt God's gentle whisper calm my heart, "Be still and know that I am God."

Thank you Father for a wonderful day for all of us!

Through the Clouds

On the tails of summer, the boys have seemed to hit the place this week where they are in need of other company. It has been a week of bickering, tattling, and bothering. So often this week, I felt like my shirt screamed with white and black stripes. With one thing after another, I have not taken the opportunity to stop and help the kids learn through this season. Tonight, after a frustrating evening, I was seeking wisdom from a much-loved website. It is so good when God gives you just the wisdom and words needed. I needed something teachable and tangible so I could help the boys work through some of their issues. As we talked, I felt like I was finally able to see through the clouds and parent with guidance and wisdom instead of as a firefighter. I'm sure these lessons will be taught and re-taught through the weeks to come. However, tonight my boys went to bed with "you're my best friend" and "I can't wait to read you that book tomorrow."